Criticizing my ex

unrelated: Some people can be so inconsiderate. They just dump their rubbish in front of the lift and expect other people to throw for them. Maybe they think that oo.. I paid my maintenance fees, so they should throw for me la!!

Seriously, I really wonder why my friends’ love life can be so complicated. After the yam’s incident, still in the process, praying for a desirable result. As well as this friend and that friend and that friend, seems so complicated.

Love is blind. It makes people become stupid. Just like me, I still remember how bad my ex treated me. Yet I trusted him, believe all the things he said and all the reasons he gave. When think of it now, I’m kinda brainless during that time. Love makes me blind and stupid at the same time.

Example, I always found 2 cinema tickets in his closet, here’s the reasons he gave:
1.

oo. I went out with my niece that day, my aunt asked me to bring her out..
wahh.. the movie was so boring till I sleep at the cinema.

2.

My 2 group mates didn’t attend the group discussion, then other groupmates found
out that they went for movie, so these tickets are the prove to show that they
are lazy. I’m keeping it because I wana confront them later..

Am I that stupid, I actually believe what he said.
Even till when we break up, he still don’t want to tell me the reason why he wana break up.. yeah.. I got dumped.. I can’t say break up, I was waiting for him to say. I seriously suspect he got another gf.. That was also after we break up then only I realized.

There were signs showing he doesn’t love me anymore, just that I don’t believe those signs. Ignoring advices from my friends, trusted him 100%, listen to what he said, tried to become a better gf.

When things get worse each and everyday, I can only cry in the middle of the night. Seems like every day I’ll cry. Even my sister knows the differences in me. Moody, swollen eyes, sad face 24/7.

Stupid stupid cupid..

Luckily I now I got a better one. Someone who loves me the way I am, that’s most important right? Because you can just be yourself, never need to pretend to be someone else.

To ivan the evil,
Yes, I am childish. ( so what? I love cartoons and anime, I love to talk nonsense, I love to make people happy, i can be mature at the right time, you get it!!)

Yes, I am lazy. ( so what, I just love to lay on bed and do nothing, I love to sleep, so what, at least I got a better result than you right??)

Yes, I am dirty. ( I think you got some kind of OCD is it, better go see doc!! Seriously!! )

This was what I found over the internet,

People with OCD have repetitive obsessions and/or compulsions that cause anxiety. Everyone has unpleasant or obsessive thoughts occasionally; people with OCD can't ignore these thoughts.

He got the first obsessions. He always do the cleaning, 24/7/365

Obsessions can include:
1. thinking or feeling objects are dirty or are contaminated

2. doubts about doors being left unlocked and appliances being left switched on

3. concern over causing harm to others

4. unpleasant intrusive thoughts or images, especially about aggression or sex

5. an intense fear of making mistakes or behaving inappropriately, which can lead to indecision about simple things

6. pre-occupation with the ordering and arrangement of objects

7. repeating words or numbers in a specific way

Yes, I am conservative. (i know you can French kiss with your ordinary friend, but hell not me!! I can’t French kiss with my friends, that’s yucky!!)

Yes, I don’t know how to wear nicely. ( I like to wear clothes that I feel comfortable with, when I like the clothes, I will always wear it.)

Yes, I can speak mandarin, Cantonese, hakka, English and malay. (too bad I’m not the girl that you dream of-----a pure English speaking banana.)

So what, Im happy that i have someone who loves me the way I am.
Anyway, it just torture me because I still able to see you in uni. You know I had nightmares everytime I see you. And it is so so impolite for you to pretend not to know me at all. You sucks!!