BYE BYE S.YEE

Celebrating s.yee last day..

finally, off she goes to Australia while i am still suffocating and drowning with my workload.. so bored of it... anyway.. we went to Curve..

Had Kenny rogers and went to Laundry..

yes,, we drink and do our laundry...


joking.. Laundry is one of the pub located at the end of The Walk.. Sill..y eh.. I first thought Opera is a place for us to view opera. I didn't know it's a club.. so paiseh

Yen and Judy.. i asked everyone to wear nice nice.. end up i'm being the most normal person.. as usual.. they all give up at me already..

our very 'man' picture..

i look nice with my short hair..


got high even before i drink..
me and Judy.. sayang-ing her.. hehe.. did the most ridiculous thing today.. i tried to match her up with a fren of mine..well, not to say me as a matchmaker / cupid.. just want her to know more friends.. that's it!!!





group photo..

had great fun that day, nice job women!!!

21 guns

Do you know what's worth fighting for?
When it's not worth dying for?
Does it take your breath away
And you feel yourself suffocating?

Does the pain weigh out the pride?
And you look for a place to hide?
Did someone break your heart inside?
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I

When you're at the end of the road
And you lost all sense of control
And your thoughts have taken their toll
When your mind breaks the spirit of your soul

Your faith walks on broken glass
And the hangover doesn't pass
[- From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/g/green-day-lyrics/21-guns-lyrics.html -]
Nothing's ever built to last
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I

Did you try to live on your own
When you burned down the house and home?
Did you stand too close to the fire
Like a liar looking for forgiveness from a stone?

When it's time to live and let die
And you can't get another try
Something inside this heart has died
You're in ruins

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky

One, 21 guns
Lay down your arms, give up the fight
One, 21 guns
Throw up your arms into the sky, you and I




i can't get the embed version. Please get it here..
Please do listen ya..
i love this song first time I heard it, but just couldn't find the name of the song. I just discovered the song name few days back,,

Wake me up...

Hate being at home now..

Loneliness surrounded me and I just can’t stop thinking of grandma..

Sigh..

Can someone talk to me? Pull me out from grieve??

Slap me hard and wake me up..

Sungkai and Ipoh, Perak

I will make this post as short as possible.. more photos..


went to Sungkai and Ipoh last weekend , following RY and his uni friends..

Nice trip.. relaxing..

Friday(14 Jan 2011) to Sunday morning(16 Jan 2011)

Went there by taking bus, it was a rainy day~~~

Ipoh scenery, mountains..

Felda Residence Hot Springs, we rent a villa and stay 1 night there.. around RM1k plus per night.











Huge 'natural' jacuzzi at the backyard..

Hot Spring!!! super hot..

half cooked hairy leg..see the difference of the shades


for eggs..
water park.. water from mountain.. as told by ry..






Restaurant at Felda Residence

Lobby during night.. i have spoilt the photo..











View from G's apartment.. Ipoh









went to a famous (i'm assume) ipoh kuey teow ho fan soup restaurant.. as you can see.. this restaurant has many famous visitors.






In the train , on the way back seremban..

was late to take the train.. luckily train late too..

reading Paulo's book.. so far.. i am enjoying reading it..








Door can be easily open when the train is moving.. anyone can just kill themselves by jumping off the train




went to another coach to have coffee.. train's food coach..

my name

new hair style

ladies and gentlemen,

here you go!!

my shoulder length hair..

my sis say no difference before and after i cut my hair..

-________________-

cut so much ady say no difference...


so, nice or not???

Dream

Yesterday when i was in Ipoh, i dreamt of grandma..

Finally...

I was so happy because i can finally dream of her. I know it was a dream in that scene.. i have already accept the fact that she is gone.

first thing said to me is that.. " Do you wana follow me?"

yupe, my grandma blurted out whether I wana follow her.. you see, i know it's a dream so i say no.. i say grandma you go peacefully.. and i saw white fog behind her where she was standing..

then i remembered my brother once said that.. if i ever dream of grandma, please ask her the lottery number.. so i did!! grandma just give me 5 digits numbers..( i bought the numbers already, didn't come out..)

after that, grandma constantly appear in my dream that night.. i was having dream within dream..inception?? i told my siblings that i finally dreamt of grandma!! then i saw grandma was there with us..

grandma appear again in a scene where i was watching tv... then i asked her.. poh.. why ?? is there anything bad going to happen to our family? she didn't reply.. so i asked again.. is it auntie's family or our family? she replied yes when i say our family..

i got so emo the whole day after i dreamt of her.. i'm worry.. dream is just a dream.. please forget it..

still hoping that grandma lives happily in her world..

Reluctantly I have to let her go

It’s been almost 2 weeks since I lost my beloved grandma.. As people been telling me, time will heal the pain.

I’m trying to cope with the differences now.

Everytime when I go back, I still call my grandma like usual once I enter the room. The difference is, she has gone. I tend to talk to myself as if I’m still having normal conversation with grandma. I still tried very hard to imagine that my grandma still sleeping there, or still talking to me, or still telling me her weirdest dream ever.

I know my grandma wouldn’t want me to cry so much. I’ve stop crying already. All right, I still shed my tears when think of her. But become lesser compare a week ago.

As what my sister say, try to make myself busy in order not to think of grandma. I did, and it kinda worked. But once you have nothing to do, once your mind starts to get blank, her images will start flowing inside my mind.

I have to admit, it’s a very difficult stage for me to go through. Losing her is such an intolerable pain for me to handle. I’ve dreamt this before, that when I come home, my grandma gone. I can’t find her anywhere. The feeling of losing her haunts me all the time. And when the nightmare becomes reality, I have break down emotionally.

My friend says I have to let her go. Yes, I’m letting her go now.

Reluctantly I have to let her go.