Most people think they have no option but to settle for what life has shown them.
A few lucky ones know that they can change their lives and go searching for something better.
Work has been quite tough for me to handle. I don’t know if it is because I am not smart enough or fast enough or it is because of the company’s systems or even internet speed that caused my job to be so freaking slow.
Everyday, when I start working, adrenaline will start pumping, phone will start ringing, people will start sending e mails, screens will keep popping up. I feel like I can never finish clearing my emails. I feel scared to open my mail box, 100 over mails waiting for me everyday.
Sometimes, I just feel like giving up and go away.
Maybe this job is too tiring.
Maybe I am too stupid for this job.
I got pimples since I start working. When I was in uni last time, growth of pimples was never an issue, not even for once. Dark circles are getting darker, I am getting older. Had nightmares about me unable to finish my job.
i hate work life integration.
Think from a bright side.
Got work, got money.
Sigh..
Dear a…
I don’t want work already. Faster become rich and marry me and support me financially.
Your money is my money, my money is my money.
Hahahahahahah..
I know this will not happen in within few years time.
Recently, I have heard several SERIOUS things that I thought I will never come across with in my entire life.
It is obvious that my new housemates are living a problematic life. Those complicated parts are mainly because of their friends or even enemies. Well, they taught me to be good to enemies as well.
Everyday, she will talk about finding help, police and stuff. They always don’t want to say things in front of me fearing that I might get frightened or get shocked.
What kind of serious things am I talking about?
Something like.. ermm..
Mafia member, taking revenge for the best friend who was killed by another mafia gang; being able to see and sense the appearance of ghost and being followed by one as well; police wanted criminal, abortion, run away from home, and even drugs.
Within 2 months, I have been exposed to these kind of SERIOUS things.
Never in my life I would predict that 1 day, I will have such complicated friends.
Am I supposed to move out and try to get a normal life back?
Went to take my convo gown and stuff… After that went to Midvalley with Hin and his bunch of friends. Not bad right, I can still meet new friends. haha..
Midvalley was having some sort of Alice in the Wonderland’s event. Those mushrooms were so cute and they made me laugh just by looking at them. See, an off day can easily make me happy.
After that, met up with a friend to watch that 72 Tenants.. so funny and I really enjoyed watching it. Took some mushrooms photos after the movie.
Tea party in the story
I felt so awkward taking photos in front of so many people. I know they were not watching or peeking at me, I just felt uncomfortable to pose in front of the camera. Gosh, I have become a shy nerdy again.
Was moving around when friend tried to take a photo of mine. I was being forced, that’s why. And once again my friend said I am weird because I went into the bookstore instead of shopping.
MEOWWWW
My dinner
A new Unforgettable memory
We went for Japanese food. Of course the menu showed a huge variety of food and I couldn ’t make up my mind as I felt like trying every one of them. In the end, I chose a set dinner and also a plate of their March Special-soft shell crap wrapped with vege and stuff.
Green tea
Unagi
very very nice!!! soft shell crap wrapped with bla bla whatever
My set dinner- Japanese Hambuger. You know why I ordered this?
Because Natsume (an anime character in Keroro) made Hamburger as dinner. I have no idea, I always wonder why those Japanese anime characters were so excited when they know they are going to have hamburgers as dinner. And so I ordered it.
Hamburgers seem appealing.
And then a question arose in my mind.
Is this chicken or beef?
HAM BA GA (HAMBURGER)
I don’t really like to eat beef due to my religion. i stop eating beef for a couple of years ady.
Then I was thinking, I have to eat also right. I can’t just throw it aside.
So I manipulated myself saying that, it is chicken. I am eating chicken, it tastes exactly like chicken.
After I finished it, actually there were still 2 small pieces. I couldn’t stuff anything into my mouth anymore.
I forced my friend to eat, but he couldn't eat beef of course. So My friend asked the waiter.
“Beef”, the waiter answered.
And I started laughing.
Laugh , laugh, laugh. (people sitting around sure think that i went berserk)
Waiter even asked me why i couldn't eat beef?
this is how i answered.
" Er, i don't really eat beef, you should have told me that it is chicken."
I felt so silly because I was so sure that the hamburgers were made of chicken. At 1 point, I even thought that I was eating pork.
I am so good in manipulating myself until I believe my own lies.
I feel like I am so stupid. Every time I asked senior some questions regarding the work, she will give me a huge sigh. And she will ask me back, what do you think?
All these things make me as if I am such an idiotic useless person as I couldn’t find the answers myself. That I keep on asking her questions, bothering her.
Sigh..
See pei said working is like that. No matter where I work, is still the same.
Hin gets a better place than me. Lesser workload, friendlier teammates, back home on time.
I must cope up with my job.
I must not feel useless and stupid.
I realize that without the social life makes me moody because my time is currently occupied by work. Hanging out with friends enables me to talk and laugh more.
I must finished my work faster so that I am able to go back home earlier!!!!
Go back home earlier = having social life = own activities = finish reading my books = no supper = sing karaoke until 4am
I’m supposed to enjoy my weekend instead of staying inside my room. There is loads of work waiting for me to finish. I really mean my work. The working’s work.
11.25PM. I haven’t have my dinner. Waiting my housemate to buy me McD as dinner or should I say supper?
I Can’t access to Internet for the past few hours. I can’t talk to Ry. When I am able to access, he is not.
Saturday night is suppose to be a fun day. I should have utilize my weekend well. But I haven’t finish my work, I don’t want to drag and drag, later on I can’t cope with my job role.
Sigh…
I am getting older and older, no more healthy lifestyle.
Never eat fruits and vegetable. Become a second hand smoker. Stress. Disappointment. Never exercise. Work late everyday. No more social life. Work hard, but never play hard.
